PERFECTING YOUR HAPPINESS: Inspiration For Women In Crisis By Martha Trowbridge

PERFECTING YOUR HAPPINESS

Copyright 2008 Martha Trowbridge
All Rights Reserved

"Primary emotional reality is orgasmic ecstasy."
Dr. Michael Eigen, Damaged Bonds

If you could peer inside the hearts of women everywhere, you may be surprised -- and a bit saddened -- to discover the disconnect many of us feel between our life-experiences, and the *HAPPINESS* that seems to be 'out there'. How anxious we are to find happiness! How desperate. Each day, millions of women spend tens of millions of dollars in frazzled pursuit of happiness, fervently hoping that this time, our happy [1] feeling will persist long after our purchase, or dinner-date, or vacation -- and not lost with the light at sundown, or vaporized with the rise of the next day's sun.

What is happiness? From whence does sustained happiness come? Sustained, the operative word. For fleeting moments of happiness can feel more cruel than none at all. They leave us wondering: What happened? Where did those moments go? Why was I unable to hold on to my happiness? Worst of all, we worry: Will sustained happiness always elude me?

Pleasure, contentment, joy -- these and other terms describe happiness. How do we prime our selves to experience these feelings, in ways that genuinely, thoroughly satisfy us? For some women, the indignities, failures and traumas of our lives may have us feeling too damaged to achieve sustained, authentic happiness. What binds others is grief at a life lived 'less than' our dreams, our imaginings of what our lives would be.

Yet happiness -- and the ability to thoroughly and repeatedly experience it -- is not a function of what we have acquired, or accomplished.

Your happiness -- its intensity, vibrancy, sustainability and authenticity -- is determined by the state of your Sacred Inner Universe -- the vast reality within you that is timeless, transcendent, limitless -- and astonishingly accessible!

If happiness is your goal, re-constructing your Inner Universe is the most important activity in which you can engage -- for this is where your Spirit [2] dwells.

Genuine happiness really does begin within. Think back to the times when you've felt best; did these feelings not emanate 'outward' from within you??

One of my intellectual heroes, Dr. Michael Eigen, states: "Primary emotional reality is orgasmic ecstasy." It's true. My litter of kitties confirm this. So does every innocent, every creature who does not writhe within the tortures of her sufferings.

Yes, suffer we all have. So how can we achieve "orgasmic ecstasy"? Or at least, our fair share of happiness?

Although you may expect that I will now assign a checklist of things to do, in order to find your happiness, I will not.

Instead, I instruct you to do one thing: commit to honor, respect and heed your sacred Spirit -- Who, if you pause and truly listen, will speak to you as you seek happiness, and tell you what to do.

Sustained, authentic happiness requires radical re-orientation. It necessitates your having a trusting relationship with your sacred Spirit. It involves serious attention, determination, devotion and open-heartedness, even when you are fearful. In a word, it demands faith: in your Spirit, and in the process.

And it means work. Hard work.

Yet oh what work it is! Clearing debris from your mind, polishing your heart til it shines, planting within you a landscape of breathtaking beauty, fragrance, and quietude.

And then: the utter joy of constructing for your Spirit a lovely home within you. A Temple, in which She can fittingly dwell.

If happiness is what you yearn for, this very moment, turn your gaze inward, and open your heart to your Spirit. By this act, this very moment, you begin to fashion your self into The Woman You Were Born To Be. The woman you would be right now, had your life been free of its woes. A scintillating woman -- profoundly empowered, immensely satisfied, divinely serene. An 'enviable' woman -- one who authentically loves her self, through and through.

A woman who is HAPPY.

Though this transformation may seem huge and unlikely to be accomplished, the process is quite simple. As is the principal tool: imagination.

Imagine that within you exists a vast Inner Universe, a private Inner Universe, a sacred Inner Universe. [Surprise: It really does!]

Now imagine your Spirit dwelling there. What does She see? What does She feel?

What does She wish for, oh so dearly?

Respecting your Spirit commences with acknowledging Her vital presence within you. Listen to Her. Defer to Her judgment. Indulge Her. Make it your solemn promise that every day, you will do your very best to fill whatever needs She expresses.

A properly re-ordered, re-constructed Inner Universe optimizes your opportunities for happiness. When, with every breath, you accept, protect, nurture, embrace, extend, develop and celebrate your Spirit, your entire life acquires a glorious radiance -- and no longer will you have to 'seek' happiness. For happiness will dwell within you.

Your Spirit knows precisely who you are, what you have endured, and what you now need. She is the sacred Eternal within you. At this very moment, your Spirit speaks. Hearken! In Her gracious hands are precious keys -- the keys to your perfect happiness.

NOTES:

1. The Encarta World Dictionary defines "happy" thus: Feeling or showing pleasure, contentment, or joy; causing or characterized by pleasure contentment, or joy; feeling satisfied that something is right or has been done right.

2. Spirit -- in my work -- is the totality of human metaphysical experience, including mind [consciousness and the unconscious]; soul [the limitless in time and space -- the aspect of human existence that interconnects with the Divine]; and self [the human definitive principle -- the 'You'].